Great Truths About Life

 

GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED

1. Raising teenagers is like nailing JELLO to a tree.

2. There is always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example, I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.

3. One reason to smile is that every seven minutes of every day, someone in an aerobics class pulls a hamstring.

4. The best way to keep kids at home is to make the home a pleasant atmosphere and let the air out of their tires.

5. Car sickness is the feeling you get when the monthly car payment is due.

6. Families are like fudge .. mostly sweet with a few nuts.

7. Laughing helps. It's like jogging on the inside.

 

8. My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely.

9. If you can remain calm, you just don't have all the facts.

10. You know you are getting old when you stoop to tie your shoes and wonder what else you can do while you're down there.

11. Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.

12. Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.

13. Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the joy.

14. The more you complain, the longer God lets you live.

15. If you can remain calm, you don't have all the facts.

16. Eat a live toad first thing in the morning, and nothing worse can happen to you the rest of the day.

17. You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoes and wonder what else you can do while you're down there.

  Additions on April 6, 2010

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